I’m sure you saw my post on instagram but if not….
baby baby baby. I’m 10 weeks tomorrow. Prim is going to be a big sister!? My forever baby. I feel like I have so much to catch up on here about how it all came to be (don’t worry, no specifics).
Well first, can I get an Amen Hallelujah PTL for NFP?! 2 years of Marquette Method. Thanks to NFPing, I knew pretty much as soon as I could find out. We were in Lake Arrowhead over New Years and I was feeling OFF towards the end of the trip. We got back and I knew it was too early to test but I did anyway and got a negative. The next day I tested again and got this:
There was the FAINTEST line, but I didn’t put much faith into it. Then Amina brought me fancy Clearblue Digital tests and it said, “NOT PREGNANT”. Rumor has it that if you open the test, you can just read the stick so I did and look here:
2 lines! Pregnant! We weren’t shocked because #charting, but SO excited. Later that night I was reading about digital tests on my phone and came across a forum that said all digital tests have 2 lines and not to open them and read them because it doesn’t mean anything…. I felt crushed! I was so upset and it sounds silly, but I felt almost like I lost this hypothetical baby. I didn’t realize how bad I wanted that test to be positive until I found out it really was a negative. The next morning I went to Mass alone and prayed about it and asked God to please just give me a clear positive or negative test today even though it’s still so early (9 DPO for those of you who care) because I can’t handle not knowing and was really upset over the false hope of the digital so afterwards I went and picked up First Response tests and rushed home and took one and…
Yes! My babe. Yes, I want you! I didn’t know how much I needed you already! And isn’t it funny that 4 pregnancies in and I still force myself to take a million tests. Not shown is the other Clearblue digital test I took the next day that came up “PREGNANT”.
We told the kids that night while we were driving home from the beach and they had the best responses. Ollie said, “WHAT!? How do you EVEN know for sure!?” Atlas just stared like this:
then he finally said, “I want the baby nowwwwwww!”. Prim got all scrunchy and cutesy and said, “I a baby Mama….. I a rock the baby.” with hand motions and all. Since then, Ollie asks me a few times a week what the baby has grown so far and even he is amazed knowing that this tiny human baby the size of a kumquat has all the essential body parts accounted for— eyes, brain, heart, ear lobes, nostrils, arms, legs. A HUMAN. Atlas still keeps asking when the baby is going to come out. Prim, little Prim, can be found cuddling her baby on the daily and insists it’s her baby sister.
We got our first ultrasound today and it was as magical as ever. Heartbeat was strong and 167bpm… girl?? The babe was wiggling like crazy but I got a quick glimpse of the tiny profile and I swear I saw an Atlas resemblance.
Overall I’ve been feeling OKAY— compared to so many woman who suffer so much more than I do while pregnant. I’ve been really exhausted, on and off very nauseous where I’ve had to post up in bed, and if you ask around the house I’m pretty sure everyone would agree that I have been quite moody. Being 5’2.5″, I’m already showing and my uterus is like, I know what to do and popped out pretty quickly. We are all so excited to share this news with everyone and so far everyone has been extremely positive which has been a blessing because that’s not always the case when you announce a 4th+ pregnancy. Thank you all for the kind words and congratulations we’ve been given so far. Can’t wait to share this all and see how this babes story unfolds.